Love shouldn’t hurt – ever

Power of Thought
by Teresia Smith

The human mind is an amazing thing. Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or cannot, you’re right.” In other words, what you think is what you get. That is why it is critical that you control what you allow into your thoughts. Your mind can be your greatest friend or your worst adversary.


How can you know your thoughts? Lee Colan of the L Group says, “Your mindset is nothing more than a compilation of your thoughts. Your thoughts have incredible power to shape your life and the lives of others, because your thoughts and interpretations of circumstances directly influence your beliefs, and ultimately, your actions.” Basically, your life becomes that which you constantly think upon. We all come from diverse life experiences. For someone who has escaped an abusive relationship, it’s not always easy to focus thoughts on the positive. Often, the abuser has programmed the mind to replay over and over a broken record of all your faults, real and imagined.

If you only think upon the destructive things your abuser repeated to you, these thoughts train your brain to turn this into your reality. Our goal is to help refocus you on the positives and overcome the results of the verbal abuse. If you control your mind to think on positive things consistently and intentionally, you form a positive mindset, which helps to elevate your life. Ultimately, you will draw into your life that which you constantly think about – good or bad.

I recently read a post by Marc and Angel that illustrated how each of us can think differently in the same situation. Marc and Angel told this story, “A puppy thinks: “Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a warm, dry home, pet me and take good care of me… … THEY MUST BE GODS!” A kitten thinks: “Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a warm, dry home, pet me and take good care of me… … I MUST BE A GOD!” Same situation, different thinking.”

If negativity has been getting the best of you, if you’ve become someone you no longer recognize because you have changed yourself to please others, if you have been choosing destructive coping skills to just numb yourself, if you feel you are just going through life aimlessly with no goals, or if you are feeling totally beaten down and depleted, this is a good time to answer the call to change. It may feel easier to just keep going the way you are now, but if you keep doing the same things, you will keep getting the same results. Changing your thoughts can change your life.
Crisis Services of North Alabama offers a variety of free and confidential services to survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence, including crisis counseling, court advocacy, and access to a sexual assault nurse examiner. You may reach our Jackson County office at 256.574.5826 for an appointment. You may also reach a trained crisis counselor at our 24/7HELPline at 256.716.1000. Reach out. You are not alone.

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