Wednesday, 16 May 2012 08:54
Why are some people so full of hatred they would try to ruin someone’s reputation and cause an only child hundreds of miles away to nearly have a heart attack?
Why do people tell vicious lies to others to make them hate you? Why would they knowingly try to destroy your world when you thought it had already been destroyed when your only son had just died a few weeks ago? God only knows, but that has happened to me.
When my son died I thought my world as I knew it was over, and try as I might I have not been able to get very far past it. Someone asked me one day, “what in the world is going to happen to you next?” I wondered the same thing. I thought I had braced myself while waiting, until I found myself floating in a sea of lies and hurt; a hurt like no other to me, for I have always tried to live a decent life. I have never done drugs in my life and have fought for those who do for a big part of my life.
Last week, as usual, I was visiting drug court and everything was on schedule as I handed out copies of the Serenity Prayer to clients as they left the court room. A friend of mine and I proceeded to my home to make plans for Celebrate Recovery Inside which we are planning to start soon. We worked in my sun porch for about forty five minutes or an hour and my friend went home.
Later my daughter called me long distance almost in hysterics screaming questions at me. Someone had called her at work claiming to be concerned about me and told her I was staggering around at drug court, fell once, and later at home. My friend had to wrestle pills from me to keep me from taking more (my daughter was afraid I was trying to commit suicide.) There were a lot more lies including a lewd story about me making a scene declaring my undying love for someone who is only a dear friend. My daughter refuses to repeat some of them to me, and I could not remember them all as I was so distraught and crying.
My daughter immediately hung up. After being scared to death and calling me to see if I was all right and finding out that nothing was wrong with me, she spent an hour trying to get hold of herself while she worked on an important contract she was trying to finish.
I couldn’t stay home by myself after the phone call, so I got in my car and went to the County Park where I sat down on a bench in the sunshine. My sister came along a while later and wanted to know if I wanted to drive to another town for a meal and shopping. When we returned to the park for my car I decided to walk a while. Anything to keep from going home. As I finally did start home I noticed the time, about 5:40, and I remembered that the group FOCUS met at 6:00 at Skyline. I headed up the mountain and met with a group of Christian people who gave me the love and comfort I needed. I felt the presence of my dear Lord and Savior and I felt peace. I came down the mountain glad the day was over, but it wasn’t.
Almost as soon as I returned from FOCUS I received a phone call (I now think this person had been in the park watching for me to come home.) This person, someone I knew, began asking questions about some things and every time I answered I was called a liar. The harangue continued, still snarling at me and calling me a liar, for a good fifteen minutes (I don’t know why I didn’t hang up.)
The attack had been well-planned. Call my daughter and scare her to death and then call me with the accusations, repeatedly calling me a liar and devastating me.
I had made a mistake and used a name incorrectly in an email; she said “that’s what that (drugs) will do.” I thought I had not heard her right but I had! What in the world was happening to me?! She coldly accused me again and again of things I was not guilty of and again and again I tearfully asked why. My heart was breaking and all I could think of was “Why?”
She accused me of some awfully ugly and demeaning things, drugs among them. And why at a time like this, when I am grieving so for the loss of my only son?
How she must hate me. And I cannot think of a single reason why.
I hope she ceases and desists from telling these lies to anyone else.
My daughter is an attorney.
